Britney Ever After 2017

Director

Leslie Libman (NCIS)

Writer

Anne-Marie Hess (Beauty and the Geek)

Notable Actor

Natasha Basset (Hail, Cesear!)

 I was excited when I heard this movie was being made. Britney is my girl, in her day she was THE QUEEN OF POP, period. (To be honest I still have her greatest hits CD in my car and it goes hard.) My dreams of an amazing  biopic were crushed when I found out that Lifetime would be making this film. Like the Aaliyah movie that came out in 2015 on the same network, it was made without anyone's blessing. It, also like the Aaliyah movie, is bad. Really bad.
The movie format is Britney doing a very intense and personal TV interview. She is asked a simple question, gives a very complex yet stupid answer and then it cuts to  flashbacks.
"I want what everyone wants...love. Not because I'm Britney Spears, because I'm Britney Jean. "
Lifetime wants to show us Britney's rise to fame and how hard her crash was but it's done such in a rather ridiculous way. The tone is overly serious but the acting is over the top and cheesy, the casting is horrible and the story is just down right silly. 
They decide to start her rise to fame after the success of  Baby one more time. This song put Britney on the map. Apparently she was still very much loyal to her country roots at this time. She boards an RV with her current boyfriend, (someone from her home town who she definitely will be leaving behind soon). The young star is just in awe of the big bus.
"LOOK, they have cheese puffs!"
Immediately we learn that her parents are a bit of a mess. Britney's father is a drunk and her mother specializes in putting on a brave face and sweeping everything under the rug. Britney, before she became a mega-star seems like a sweet girl. However she is quick to crush her current boyfriends heart when her and Justin Timberlake link up. This brings me to one of the movies big problems, the casting. The young woman that plays Britney, she aight. I don't hate her but I don't love her either. What it comes down to is I just  don't believe she's Britney. Granted those are some huge shoes to fill but this newcomer isn't up to snuff. At least she's TRYING though. The guy they chose as Timberlake is just an insult. I mean it's like they literally told him, read these lines like you think a black person would. 
"Nah she's straight bugging now!"
Total "wigger" status. And don't get me started on the random, generic, white people they slapped together to make up the band N SYNC.
The movie also alleges that Britney and Justin made a sex tape and it was temporarily stolen. Her parents reactions are  supposed to show us how hard it was for Britney to deal with the constant fighting but its pretty funny, as a friend calls the police they say;
Mom: They stole your boudoir video!
dad: My little girl made a boudoir video!?!?
Britney: DADDY please!
Mom: we are not doing this right now!
dad: oh yea, because you call all the shots around here huh? 
mom: Always have been! You've been racing yourself to the bottom of a beer bottle.
Britney: can ya'll stop it the police are coming!
dad: If its illegal to have a couple of drinks and speak my damn mind they can arrest me!...Your mom used to be fun ya know, until she became such a bitch!
Oddly enough the family friend that calls the cops to report the "missing items" finds out from the police that some kids stole their stuff. Apparently the cops already had their "personal items" in custody. Why was this even included in the film? 
One thing that could have been really clever was showing Miss Spears career chronologically by "showing" her VMA performances. However they can't feature her actual music. Attempting to show her music career without her music posed so many awkward scenes. So we get to see Britney walking off stage for each performance. When they show her walking off stage you don't get the feeling that she's performing in this grand concert hall with thousands of fans. The applause and screams from the crowd aren't even loud.The "stage" she's on looks like it belongs in a high school auditorium. Its obvious she's on a set and it's just pathetic. They try to do something memorable for Britney's huge performance to Slave 4 U , where she unforgettably dances with a seven foot albino Burmese  Python (yes I googled it) in 2001. Instead they show her practicing  the choreography in some studio while an imitation instrumental plays in the background. It's an insult to the classic moment.  
Lifetime also focuses on Britney's  romantic relationships. I remember when  all these things happened in real life and none of them are pictured with any dignity, the things that actually happened I mean. Her and Justin breakup after he catches her cheating with dance choreographer Wade Robson. The singer tries to win Justin back by seeing him at club and engaging him in a weird dance off. I guess Justin wins this one because Britney ends up alone.  Later she marries a man for about 72 hours and her mom and manager force her to annul it. The infamous marriage to Kevin Federline is quite skimpy. Marry, kids, he cheats. She texts him
I wnt 2 dvrc u! 
Next! It seems the network is much more interested in showing Mrs. Spears while she's having undesirable public moments. Britney's breakdown happened right in front of us and it was ugly. These things are a part of Britney's legacy and that cannot be denied but the way it is portrayed I feel like I'm watching a parody. For that reason her fall from grace isn't sad, it's hilarious. They shamelessly show us their interpretation of 

• Britney in a purple wig, screaming at her mother.
• Britney telling hair stylists they are not allowed to talk to her!
• The head shave scene 
• The insipid VMA performance to Gimme More. Well they can't show it, so they have Britney walk off stage, look at the playback and then ask everyone if she was really that bad.

Through all of Ms. Spears woes her mom and dad were always there to help pick up the pieces (even if she was cussing them out whilst wearing a purple wig.) 
I'm also at a loss to  know the angle of the people making this film. Do they have any respect for the woman or did they just want to show us her breakdowns which I would rather pull up on youtube.  While she's giving her hard hitting interview the screenwriter has Britney giving some truly STUPID analogies but is saying them in such a way that she thinks she's Aristotle
"Life is like a water slide ya know?....it's fun and exciting but it's also scary. And you can't get off until you reach the bottom."

Um, OK. Thank you very much for that Captain Obvious. Alright, I think I'm done here.